Unless you’ve been living under a rock or reside in a country out of the USA political loop, you know all about the “Me Too” movement. It represents the acknowledgment and awareness that sexual assault, harassment, and harm towards women has run rampant and will no longer be tolerated.
In light of recent headlines, I thought it would be an excellent opportunity to acknowledge the role sexual violence often has in the experience of infertility.
Your subconscious remembers
Even if you’ve consciously put it out of your mind or chosen not to let it hold you back, significant events of your past can affect your present life. What do I mean by significant events?
- witnessing or experiencing physical/sexual abuse
- verbal/mental abuse
- derogatory, sexist remarks
- catcalls or intimidation by strangers on the street
- objectification of any form that hits your subconscious in a significant way
These incidents don’t have to resemble Hollywood depictions of rape to affect you.
Young children with developing brains can often perceive emotion without having a conscious understanding of what’s being done or said to them. This emotion becomes trapped unless resolved, especially if there are repeat incidents that connect with that same emotion.
How can “Me Too” incidents affect fertility?
Put simply, sexual abuse (in any form) can impact sexual functioning down the road. The mind’s attempt to protect someone from additional harm can result in shutting down the system.
There can also be issues of safety. If a child witnesses violence towards her mother, for example, then she might subconsciously believe that becoming a mother is not safe.
The good news
If you’re experiencing infertility, it’s worth asking yourself if there’s anything in your childhood that could potentially be sabotaging your attempts to get pregnant. If the answer is yes or maybe, then rest assured there are many pathways to healing.
While I tend to favor hypnosis for its gentleness and effectiveness for neutralizing unpleasant past events, there are many ways to resolve old wounds. The important thing is to find a method that is comfortable enough for you actually to do the work.
Working with someone you feel trust and ease with might be the most important thing you can do. I suggest you start there.
Do you suspect there might be something holding you back from getting pregnant? Share your thoughts in the comments below.